Does opting out make you a free-rider?
Many see having children as a personal decision on par with other lifestyle choices.
But the work of raising children produces something everyone draws on. Essential services, retirement systems, and social renewal all assume a next generation that somebody has to produce, at considerable cost to themselves.
Framing childrearing as social infrastructure raises sharp questions about who pays for its upkeep, whether people who choose not to raise children are free-riding, and whether parents are owed more compensation.
Get ready to challenge your assumptions with Kalpana Vignehsa.
A Senior Research Fellow at the Institute of Policy Studies at NUS, Kalpana is a sociologist who studies relationships and dating, parenthood, and binational families formed at the intersection of migration and citizen marriage. Her path has spanned consulting, design ethnography, public advocacy and academia and she works primarily through qualitative and ethnographic methods, which she uses creatively to get at how people actually live rather than how they report their lives. She has been most shaped by losing her father as a young child, living overseas for nearly two decades, and raising two children with her philosopher/husband.
A quote she loves and often shares with her children is the Latin phrase Non nobis solum nati sumus, attributed to Cicero, meaning “not for ourselves alone are we born.”
An evening when slow bar meets reality check, we'll explore whether framing childbearing as social infrastructure holds, and what it would mean if it did. Equal parts sharing, discussion, and the occasional “wait… that's uncomfortably true!”.
The Space: Mad Roaster's Slow Bar (MRSB)
Tucked away in Redhill, MRSB is a Singaporean social enterprise founded by former lawyer Madeline Chan, creating livelihoods for refugees in Thailand.
Whether you're an advocate of human-centric living or learner of sorts, this is your space to exchange perspectives and stories with others, of love under pressure.
Fair warning: conversations may get unexpectedly thoughtful.
Bits and Bobs
6.45pm: Doors open. Order a drink and unwind.
7.15pm: Dinner service.
7.25pm: Introductions. Kalpana takes the spotlight.
8.15pm: Three questions, multiple perspectives. Share your story about the topic, or listen and chime in when discussions get interesting. We will facilitate.
8.45pm: Wrap-up, mingle, and connect with fellow humans.
P.S.
Do consider using PayNow as a payment method to reduce processing fees on SoCrates so we can ensure the amount goes towards dinner, printing materials, platform usage, and other misc. expenses as Stripe and Luma take 12-15% of total ticket price. We hope to see you there!
Refunds
We understand plans change. Refunds are possible a week before the event. If there’s something urgent on the day of, please reach out to us here or via Instagram (@socrates.spot) to see how we can help 💫